We continued the story of Jason and his wife, Miranda, this week.  He’d broken a rule in their marriage: He’d made a big decision without her.  She gets home before he does (because he stopped and got her favorite flowers to “make things up to her”) and makes his favorite meal, because she knows how very stressed he’s been at work.  He feels guilty that he made the unilateral decision to quit his job and tells her what happened and she realizes that the flowers were his way of apologizing and throws them out.  He plans on going after her to “explain his side of things.”

Ephesians 4:26 New International Version (NIV)

26 “In your anger do not sin”[a]: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.

It’s funny because I was just thinking about this verse while writing a story this week. Read straight, it seems to imply that Jason should confront Miranda right then and there. After all, don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry seems pretty direct – take care of those things that anger you before you go to bed – even if it takes all night.

I don’t think it means that though. I tend to think that it means we should let go of the things that are making us angry before bed – not fight it out; but just prayerfully let it go. A lot of times if it’s late at night, and you’re tired, your mind doesn’t work as well and you just keep getting angrier and angrier.

In fact things can seem much worse if your tired and you’ll fight over things you might ordinarily not fight over if you keep going after you’re tired.

What Jason should do is go to Miranda and tell her he’s sorry. He should thank her for the consideration of making his favorite dinner and then tell her that they’ll discuss the situation with his job in the morning when they’re both rested and clear-headed. It’s important to have the conversation but right before bed is not the time to do it.

How might Jason approach a conversation with Miranda using 1 Corinthians 13

That chapter is one of my favorites because it reminds us the value of love. It’s often used at weddings for that reason – to remind the newly married couple how they should treat one another.

In verse 13 it says, “It [love] is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”

In this situation both Jason and Miranda need to be reminded of this. Jason has been behaving in a very selfish manner in all of this and doesn’t even seem to be realizing it. He’s dissatisfied with how he’s been treated at work and doesn’t think that Miranda appreciates the stress he’s been under (though that was why she made him dinner). Miranda needs to keep this verse in mind if she feels tempted to bring up Jason’s “record of wrongs” in his handling of this situation.

This, in my mind ties into the next question: What are some of the potential consequences of allowing the anger and tension between Jason and Miranda to fester.

If they don’t deal with their anger both with the situation and with one another, then they’re marriage might be torn apart by it. Both of them need to talk out what’s been happening, while avoiding casting blame on one another – choices were made, what are you going to do about them now?